ARGH.

There is nothing wrong.  But I find myself sort of adrift, and I’m not sure why.  I’m having trouble focusing on the Beck, on my food, on my exercise.  I just feel sort of “blech.”

I was trying to figure out why: I know that I was out REALLY late one night this week (went to bed at 2:30 and got up for work at 6:30), so that accounts for some of it.  When I’m really tired, I have trouble digesting food, and since my energy is low, I crave sugar and simple carbs – which then, of course, make me more tired, which makes food harder to digest, and I crave more sugar.  So there’s that cycle.

And yesterday I was EXHAUSTED (which I expected).  But for some reason that carried over into today (to my surprise), so I’m having the same digestive issues and cravings for sugar, although I did reasonably well, diet-wise.  I didn’t eat the copious amounts of sugar I wanted, but since I knew I was tired, I DID build in a relatively simple-carb afternoon snack instead of my usual yogurt or fruit or peanut butter.  (I had an apple-cinnamon Bagel-ful.) 

I also realized today that I didn’t plan out my food for the week, which led to 2 things: first, I bought food that I never prepared.  (I’m hoping it won’t go bad, and I can just fix it next week.)  Second, because I didn’t have a list I could just look at, it’s easier to choose lunches and dinners on impulse, which always means that I don’t eat as well; I get seduced by the junk food.  😉

So that’s kind of where I’m at.  I definitely need to plan ahead on my eating and exercise, and I should probably do the same for the Beck book.  I keep feeling like I don’t really WANT to plan ahead forever, but then I have to remind myself that I won’t necessarily have to, but I’m changing 20-year-old habits, so I will certainly have to do this for a while.  *snark, bitch, grump*

But now, I’m off to bed.  I have to get up early so that I can put on a Belle costume and fix my hair and apply false eyelashes and all that stuff – for work tomorrow!  LOL, a friend of mine basically dared me to wear a Princess dress to the opening of “Princess and the Frog” tomorrow (which was a totally good movie, and you should GO SEE IT!).  I told her if she bought it, I’d wear it – and she did!  I spent some time tonight altering it to fit, and tomorrow there will be serious hot rollers and assorted crap involved.  So I’m off to bed – I need my “beauty sleep” if I’m going to be a Princess tomorrow!  Ha!

EDITED 12/13/09:
Behold, the glory of the ugliest Disney Princess costume ever!  (Seriously, I swear I look 20 pounds bigger in this damn thing.)

Aaaand another one (do you like the cowboy boots?  It was raining, so Belle went rock-a-billy that day  ;D):

Finally, I had some rockin’ hair (which you can ALMOST see):

Ta-da!  😀

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5 responses to “ARGH.

  1. ARGH?
    Woman, what is it with this sudden proliferation of four-letter words on this blog? I’m shocked, I tell you, shocked!
    There is simply too much damn profanity in the world these days.

    And, for a change, an on-topic comment. Jennette Fulda, the esteemed Pasta Queen of the Half of Me blog, wrote that “waiting until I was hungry to decide what to eat was like waiting until I was drunk to decide to drive.”
    (Or something very similar to that. I might be paraphrasing slightly.) In other words, yes, planning and preparing the food ahead of time is a really good idea.

    Sometimes I do good, but then again sometimes I fall off the wagon and then shake my fist at the wagon as it retreats over the horizon without waiting for me.

  2. child crawing on my lap inher TIANA (princess and the frog pjs)

    I will be back for a real comment but must see a pic of you today—–so I can show her 🙂

  3. The princess costume is all kinds of awesome…pictures?

    I know if I eat to much starch in the winter I get the mehs…too little light and all that. Don’t let it get you down. It’s just your body rebelling on it’s way to finding it’s “groove”.
    I’m so impressed you’re planning out your meals. I keep meaning to do that…but other than making a list I’ve sort of wimped out so far. Any suggestions?

  4. Merry, I’ve read that Jenette Fulda quote, and in a lot of ways, I get it. If I’m not tired, I can do ok choosing healthy foods – I usually prefer those anyway – but when I’m tired, man, bring on the grilled cheese sandwiches. So yeah. I’m all about planning meals.

    Miz – AWWWWW!!!!! How cute she must be!! 😀 (And yes – there will TOTALLY be pictures!)

    Geosomin, pictures for sure! 🙂
    As for the food, it depends on how much you like to cook, how good at it you are and what kind of budget you have. Usually I start with a couple of “main” recipes from a book, and then make enough that I can pretty much swap them out all week, with an occasional TV dinner thrown in. I don’t mind eating leftovers if I have 2 or 3 things to choose from. When I don’t even have time to look in a book, I raid my pantry, and start figuring out what I can mix with white beans and tuna (a lot!).

    Hmmm . . . I may have to do a whole post on this for Monday!

  5. You are so darned cute! Love the pictures! And the cowboy boots totally MAKE the outfit! 🙂

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