I’m Not Dead, and I Know I Haven’t Been Posting a Lot . . .

I’m trying to figure out what I want to say.  I feel like I’m sort of at the end of one period in my life, and starting a new one.  And that new period I didn’t really expect (deep down) to have to go through: I thought I’d just quickly (and magically?) jump from dealing with disordered eating to losing weight sensibly (and speedily, although I know those things aren’t really compatible).  But it is becoming obvious that this will take some time.  More time, certainly, than I wanted to give it. 

So I’m trying to figure out how to wear this new part of my life.  It isn’t that I don’t have anything to say; it’s rather that I don’t know what it is that I WANT to say.  There’s stuff knocking around in my brain, but it won’t quite come out into the light. 

So I’m waiting.

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5 responses to “I’m Not Dead, and I Know I Haven’t Been Posting a Lot . . .

  1. it’s rather that I don’t know what it is that I WANT to say. There’s stuff knocking around in my brain, but it won’t quite come out into the light.

    I entirely ENTIRELY GET THAT and thats what sparked my mondays post.

    I then got the proverbial buttload of emails asking WHATS THE CHANGE YOURE GONNA DO?

    and I thought:

    lordy if I could articulate it I would.

  2. Times like that I wish I could draw or paint a picture or something like that. That bit about ‘being worth a thousand words’ is true sometimes.

  3. lordy if I could articulate it I would
    LOL! It’s funny that you mention Monday’s post, because after I read through a few comments asking what your big new project was, I actually went back and reread the post, thinking, “Did she announce something and I missed it?” because I’d originally read it as being more of a “knocking around in my brain” post. Good to know I hadn’t (completely) lost my mind. 😉

    I know Merry, right? But honestly, even then, I sit down with some paper and some charcoal, and STILL can’t find anything. (Though I haven’t tried it this time around. Maybe I’ll give it a go.)

  4. I totally get the “knocking around in my brain” part – it’s just that in MY brain, any ideas sort of get lonesome. Or lost in the maze (haze, daze, craz-iness) that is inside my tiny little head.
    Sigh.

    If you have an epiphany, we’ll be here, waiting. (or, in my case, staring into space, trying to remember what the heck I was planning on doing with that tiny idea struggling to express itself; fighting it’s lonely, brave way through the fog, elbowing the big, unformed blobs of inarticulateness (is that a word?)out of the way…..) …..err…. okay, I’ll stop now.

  5. LOL, BL, you crack me up. 😉

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